This is Who Runs Pop Crave
I’ve spoken before about how Pop Crave is the Walter Cronkite of twitter but where Walter Cronkite drew his authority from personality, Pop Crave draws their authority from anonymity. Every so often we speculate on the identity of the author, or organization, running the account and while the jokes are all in good fun, I never want to know. The reveal is never what we want it to be. To be terrorized by an anonymous Pop Culture news and gossip Twitter account, is to be alive. If we’ve learned anything from Gossip Girl and Pretty Little Liars, the chase is always better than the reveal. I need the mystery alive. As long as we don’t know, our guesses can be as wild as we want. Remember how disappointing the Deux Moi reveal was?
Scooter Braun
What is going on with Scooter Braun? I need to know. I hope by the time you’re reading this, whatever article that we’re all waiting on has been published. Until then, we have nothing but the meme. To me it’s funny when its singers and people who could conceivably work with Scooter Braun. They lose me when it’s fictional characters and actors. We can’t just do whatever we want! I get that everyone wants a turn but you have to actually try to make a joke. What makes your iteration of a meme better than the one previously. What makes it different? Let's play in the realm of possibility rather than whatever you think of first.
Yeah I Believe In The Holy Trinity
F. F-. This is the worst meme I’ve ever seen. If you’re going to be sacrilegious, please do it with more flair and intrigue than this. This is so incredibly boring and nerdy. It’s not even that nerdy but it reeks of nerd culture. It’s the exact kind of sentiment I can’t get behind. “My holy trinity is from Harry Potter” is the worst thought I can think of to express and if someone said that to me in real life, I shudder to think of what my reaction would be.
LA Hurricane Tweets
There was a hurricane in Los Angeles over the weekend and many took the opportunity to do some fake boots on the ground reporting, posting videos from theme park rides with controlled floods. These are funny every time. The faker they are, the better. I will never not love a “look how crazy things are” video that’s obviously fake. These were more special to me because a lot of them were from the Universal Backlot ride at Universal Studios, the theme park that sits just above Los Angeles. There’s something beautiful about the people of that city using their industry based amusement park theme ride to joke about the storm. The artifice that makes the city run and attracts both future denizens and tourists alike used to fool and deceive. There was flooding in Los Angeles that day but there is always flooding in Los Angeles, if you know the tram schedule. Always a show to be put on, and each time Los Angeles plays itself.
Side Note: For those of you keeping track at home, The Overton window has shifted on Climate Change and we are no longer blaming “The 50 People CEOs responsible.” So, as far as solutions go, Killing CEOs is out. I think we’re back to trying to fix it via personal consumption habits or perhaps even 50 solar panels in the desert again
TikTok
When You Know The Words To The Song, Sing Along
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To me, this is the definition of Hot Girl Fun. The delivery is awkward and unnecessary to the game. You can tell it was developed by the “weirdest” member of a group of pretty girls, all of whom are very normal. It’s only popular among other pretty girls, which is why it’s getting a lot of play during Bama Rush. No one actually funny, interesting, or weird is participating in the trend but girls who are trying really hard to seem quirky are having a lot of fun with it. In the videos of these girls doing this trend, they cringe at their own attempts to have fun. This silliness does not come naturally to them. The original creator has a confidence about her that makes this seem more clever than it actually is and every copy cat lacks her camera presence needed to sell this as a fun activity. Every time I hear the opening “When you know…” I know I am about to watch one of the worst videos I have ever seen. No presence, no timing, no fun at all.
2 Die 4
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Addison Rae is back. Addison Rae is the TikTok girlie to go mainstream with continued success. Her post TikTok career is flourishing, after being resurrected. We respect her and her attempts to be a Pop girlie now. She had to prove herself but she’s risen to the occasion. Returning to TikTok with a semi ironic dance is exactly what was needed. Self referential in the way Pop Stars have to be now. The dance is equal parts ironic and well executed. As much as it need to be in either direction to be successful.
August Challenge
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Put them down! Stop spinning your cats. They’re gonna throw up on your carpet.
Cat SPINNNNNNNNNN! lol....so not funny.