Meme Report 7/14

Tell Me the Truth, I'm Ready to Hear It

Twitter

A lot of memes this week. Some have fully come and gone in the days since the last meme report, but since they happened I will be giving my review. 

Toby Maguire Spiderman Tell Me The Truth

I know I said last week that I loved the vintage feel of the Fast and the Furious family meme but I hate this meme. I’m cutting this off at the source. No more of this. No more prequel trilogy memes. No more Toby Maguire Spiderman memes. What the hell is going on? Stop watching movies and go outside. Or watch something new! Plus, it's the same format as the Lisa Simpson meme. An uncomfortable truth no one wants to hear. It’s too many panels and not enough info. Unlike the Orange County Chopper argument format, which covers all complex sides of an argument, this one has four panels to say a single sentence and no one seems to be playing with the format at all. Do better. 

Bethenny and Dorinda, It’s Bad

This one has been kicking around for a while and it makes me laugh every time. I’m biased because I love Real Housewives of New York. Bethenny and Dorinda are two of my favorites but I think this meme is good beyond them. It’s mostly used on adutl-gay-semi-serious-half -joking stan Twitter to finally admit something we all pretended was good is actually bad. The way Bethenny finally tearfully admits it’s bad lets us all feel a release. We can talk about the ethics of Real Housewives videos where the women are talking about their traumas at a later date, but for now I will leave this one alone. The ethics of stan twitter in general are murky and vile so it feels unfair to single this video out. Your mileage may vary as far as ethics but I find this video useful for finally admitting “it’s bad” whatever it may be.

When You Beat The [x] Allegations

The phrase “when you beat the who farted allegations'' has been kicking around in my head all week. It's so funny. Anything that heightens everyday situations into a court of law makes me laugh. The image that sometimes accompanies the phrase helps to paint the picture. I can see it now. All of my friends and I, in a courtroom presenting evidence as to who we think farted. The jury of bystanders coming back with a verdict. Not guilty. He who smelt it dealt it or whatever law they chose to apply. We erupt in cheers as my team wins. We beat the who farted allegations and are back on top. No longer guilty of stinking up the gathering. The joy this brings me can never be taken away. Any menial accusation of another being decided like it is the OJ trial is and forever will be funny to me. 

New Sex and the City Promotional Image

I don’t hate it. I don’t love it either. It’s fine. It’s just ok. Listen we all want the Sex and the City reboot to be good. We want it to capture our attention and give us life lessons and fun fantasies of rich women in New York. We are all very nervous that it won’t. No Samantha? Blonde Cynthia Nixon? The whole idea of the second movie? It’s not looking good. But we’ll give it our best go and part of that is giving it our best memes. We did what we could. We were given an image and those that felt compelled,made their edits. What more can we say? 

Twitter ain’t ready for that conversation

Twitter ain’t ready for that conversation is perhaps both the most and least correct statement of all time. It is a place where constant discussion is happening about every single topic imaginable but by the dumbest people in the world. We are simultaneously ready for any argument and too stupid to discuss it. This meme had the addition of pictures and a greater than sign. While most of the time when Twitter isn’t ready for a conversation the ideas are somewhat complex and need to be argued out,  something like….. Kink at pride for example. This one however is easy. Twitter is very much ready for the conversation of something is better than something else. It’s literally all we talk about. Call me when it’s a conversation we’re actually not ready for. 

Tiktok

I was on Tiktok all day saturday because I’m fighting off the last remnants of gay flu and I have to say there are no good memes right now. Everyone is having too much fun and I need them inside making memes. Or outside making memes. We need a new version of “I think x is going to be the drunkest” or “last night I told you I loved you” to make the most of our experiences in the outside world. 

Dang Lil Mama You is Such a Loser

These videos chill me to my core. Most of them are not about behavior I engage in but if one ever called me out I would stop doing whatever it was accusing me of doing. Girls lip synching  to Nicki Minaj saying “you is such a loser” is so pointed and yet understated that you can’t help but be stopped in your tracks. Your behavior is so bad that these girls can’t even bear to give you a second thought. Just one exasperated “dang lil mama you is such a loser” and they move on. It’s a good meme because it means we’re finally criticising each other without hiding behind “what happened to girls supporting girls ?” but in classic girl fashion we’re being as mean as we possibly can with laser accuracy. 

The Guys Dancing

I like the guys dancing, despite what mose from ned’s declassified says. I don’t know why she felt compelled to engage in meme criticism in a way that is ill informed and stupid. It’s harmless and we’re all having fun. It’s simple and short. Plus we get to see people who can’t dance make a fool of themselves. All in all a good meme. Especially when we’re in a meme drought. 

There’s No Such Thing As a Coincidence

As I said before I’m giving Tiktoks that go to Twitter home court advantage. Someone said Jay R Scotty is one wrong move away from becoming this guy and there’s some truth to that. I was originally lukewarm on this guy. He was fine. A little quirky with one weird video. I did not believe he had longevity to him. But the next video he did with the children really blew me out of the water. He knows exactly what he’s doing. Because I’m stupid and believe in things like the energy of the universe I think he’s good and want him to stick around. Me and the other girls who believe birth control is making us all insane (don’t yell at me I’m on nexplanon) would love to add him to our list of spiritual guides which includes Marianne Williamson and the affirmations instagram. 

Notes

The planet money Tiktok guy is single (he’s on bumble and he lives in New York) and I think the Washington post Tiktok guy is married based on the ring that I never noticed before in his videos. I’m also dumb and it could be on the wrong hand. So adjust your Most Eligible bachelors of Tiktok list accordingly.