Meme Report 12/18+12/25
Not A Creature Was Stirring
Luigi Perpwalk
Maybe I’m the idiot. I don’t understand why you would try to curb Luigi's folk-hero status by doing a perp walk. He is only made more sympathetic every time the cops try to make him seem violent. Every time someone tries to tell me I shouldn’t have sympathy for him I dig my heels in. You want me to side with the NYPD and Eric Adams as they waste taxpayer dollars to avenge the death of a CEO of one of the most evil industries on the planet? Get real. Luigi’s alleged crime was inspired by an unfair system and every time they try to show us how “the system” is going to take care of him, it only further proves how unfair the system is. He is more vindicated with each attempt to undermine him.
Luigi’s Lawyer
A new bombshell has entered the Villa. I had doubts before about how long this would capture the nation’s attention but now that we know his lawyer is willing to play the game we have a show on our hands. She vaguely looks like RHONY alum Heather Thompson and has already attacked Eric Adams in her opening arguments. In the movie version, this is when Amy Landecker comes on screen and starts to generate Oscar buzz. This is how we redeem Marcia Clarke. Just don’t change your hair!
Luigi’s Sweater
Someone in that office is doing the Lord’s work. They put a nice Italian boy in a maroon sweater on December 23rd. East Coast Christmas is on everyone’s minds already and he seems like he just stepped out of his family home to help his grandma into the house. One tweet said, “he should be in mass.” The thought we were all supposed to have unconsciously. This close to Christmas, one could mistake the courtroom for a church. The seats behind him could be pews and his lawyer could be his mother. It’s a familiar scene and Luigi fits right in.
Pictures I Took in America’s Bible Belt
We need Tumblr back. We need a place on the internet where amateur artists can share their art with minimal criticism. The Twitter intelligentsia is too mean and too stupid. Their hearts are closed off to some random guy taking passé pictures of the American South. Let him develop his style by being a little cliched! It’s part of the journey of developing a voice! It’s fine to visit well-trodden territory, especially on Twitter. It’s not the end of the world if someone takes a few pictures of “Hell is Real” billboards and churches. Also, come on it’s photography. he did go there and it did look like that. One thing about the bible belt, there are a lot of churches. You’d be a bad photographer if you went and didn’t take a photo of a church. It’s an easy American mythos.
Gif
The world is run by a secret cabal of gay guys who decide what random years-old gif is going to be popular in a given week. This is my plea to be let into the group. I have an eye for it! I see what you see in these gifs and I can help choose the next one. Teach me your ways and let me join the club. It’s not about that week’s specific gif, it’s about the nature of the gifs and that there’s a new one each week. Let me in the archives and present my case.
TikTok
Normally, Christmas is better on Twitter, the live dispatches from everyone’s holiday dinners and time spent with extended family fill me with joy and make me feel closer to the world. This year though I’m seeing some pretty good TikToks in the home for the holidays genre. Most importantly I’m seeing some great kitchens which is what this holiday is all about: seeing the inside of other people’s homes via social media.
Songs I Would Play If
If everyone's sense of humor is "dark" and "fucked up" then no one's is. Thank god for that. This is the lowest common denominator of pretending to be a deeply twisted individual. I'd like to think at least some of us are over the age of 12 and don't need to make these jokes. Not that they're in poor taste or that I'm offended, I'm deeply bored. I can't tell if the app is solely populated by children or if everyone simply has childish taste.
Pretending I Got Into Harvard
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The most creative thing I’ve seen in a while on this app. We need to bring back play and most importantly playing pretend. Have you ever played pretend with your friend or by yourself in your adult life? It’s so fun. It’s more fun than it was when we were kids. Try playing pretend with your friends this holiday season when you’re bored in the house. Watch the childlike joy return
Welsh 5
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Like anything worth seeing on the internet, I'm well acquainted with the Welsh 5. For many this past week was the first time they were seeing these people. They were shocked by their accents, their eating habits, and their cultural touchstones. American outrage drove engagement for my favorite inhabitants of the British Isles and they got a great vacation out of it. I love Corey, Lea, and Charlie. They are Teflon in the face of attempts to educate and explain to them how Americans do anything. All the yelling gets drowned out in the name of "bullying" and they carry on. They are invincible and indestructible. Their experiences in New York are my favorite documentary I've seen this year.
IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE